Mrs Swire’s Diary……… A Constituent’s view

From a constituent:

If, as she reports, Mrs Swire was her husband’s “part-time” political researcher surely we are due a refund on the £35,000 FULL-TIME salary WE paid her during that time?

Did this “research” for which we paid include endless poor taste remarks about sex and the cupping the testacles of at least one man in public?  Are we due co-author payments?

Who are the “toilet seat” East Devon Tory councillors?  And what does this soubriquet mean?  Were they simply there for Hugo to defacate on?

What really happened with the (young, female) Guatemalan ambassador (we await Hugo’s diary for that one perhaps).

And why and how did Nadine Dorries ever get in the position where (she alleges) she was offered a chance to “feel the mink” under Hugo’s coat in the back of a taxi?

How did Hugo REALLY feel about Claire Wright? [Owl has been asked to insert this photograph as a possible potential diarist clue]:

This constituent can’t wait for Hugo to write HIS diaries …

June 10th: made honey with my bees …..

July 20th: Sasha cupped X’s danglers again – what a lark – the toilet seats were shocked

August 15th: had another unavoidable meeting with toilet seats – God how I want to be back with my honey …..